Mafia Gazette Past Issue 155
The Mafia Gazette Issue 155 For All The News That Is News (E&OE) Wednesday 4th June 'THE END OF AN ERA ' By Staff Reporter As the coffin closed on Mr. Randle McMurphy so did an era for this paper. The late Editor was mercilessly beaten to death in jail after having a few too many at the bar. Mr. McMurphy will be well known for his work here at the paper and on the Miss Mafia contest. Though we shall all be sad to see him leave, the paper must go on. Shortly after the funeral, a new Editor was named. Miss Daizee Mae will now be overseeing the production of the famous paper. She comes to us from the southern regions leaving behind the sun to battle the presses, deadlines, and Chicago’s famous windy weather. Growing up in the business, she claims to have ink running through her veins and vows to make improvements. Upon her arrival, she toured the business carefully noting each area and possible changes. As she moved on to the staffing, she was a bit disheartened at first. Never giving a second look back, Daizee began to contact the reporters and hung out the hiring sign. An influx in applicants and pieces amazed the newcomer and put her right on target for her scheduling. Here at the paper, we want to wish Miss Daizee all the best in her new position and look forward to the changes she has planned. 'VIOLENCE TEARS AT THE NATION ONCE MORE ' By Oscar_McJunior Just following the sunrise early Sunday morning, supposed Miami crime boss Albert addresses a small crowd regarding a recent outbreak of violence across the nation. His public announcement firmly laid down his family's stance in the conflict stating, "Miami has not been, and has no intention of being a part of this ongoing war". He pointed out that it was a conflict between the families residing in Las Vegas and those residing in New York. He then went out to refute claims that he or his family was members, nor associated with, the Conceptualist family based in New York claiming "we share no bond to the Conceptualists of New York". The Conceptualists are an old and established family, headed by crime boss Krazy_Kripp, that has a rather violent past, but until recently had managed a two month long period of relative calm across the nation. Apparently the main source of these claims linking them (AllStars) to the Conceptualist crime family were from a group of people from Las Vegas, who had actually spent time as associates of the AllStars following the death of the late crime boss Shinobi. But Albert made it very clear that his family was remaining neutral in this event and asking that his group be left out of it. He was very adamant about the war being a taxing and sad thing, with no apparent positive outcome. Though he ended on a strong note, he continued to claim that “If Miami is attacked, she will not be afraid” and that the retaliation would be brutal and bloody. Following the speech a couple figures also had words to speak, including the Dallas construction mogul and supposed crime boss Johnnie-Walker, of which Albert was reportedly very thankful for. The speech was met with a general sense of agreement, with those speaking back stating that a stance of peace, and not war, being taken was a commendable and brave thing to do, whilst the rest of the country seems swallowed in conflict. **** Later in the day a meeting took place in an undisclosed neutral location between Albert and the descendent of a prominent figure in the Las Vegas crime syndicate, GlowWorm. The general state of things was discussed, and per an earlier public statement, peace was agreed upon. It was agreed upon there, officially, that there was no bad blood between either Las Vegas or Miami, and that peace efforts would commence to try to end the killing. The parties involved would not go into details, but again reinforced that there were to be no more acts of violence between the two city's families. In a short interview with Albert, he asked a question addressed to the public "Why should the blood of innocent people be spilt over the foolish actions of others?" It seems that Miami is the first city taking a firm step back towards the state of peace that was previously experienced and it brings hope that further discussions may take place between the parties involved in the killing. 'CITIZENS’ ANGELS IN DISGUISE ' By Gazette Reporter Downtown Vegas just an average looking girl on her way home from a busy day at work, dashing down an alley way making her way home when quicker than telling the dealer to ‘hit me‘, a knife, a group of men with crime in mind, a couple of burly associates and an angel in disguise. All the ingredients for a best seller but it happened for real within the streets we walk day after day. After the initial shock of a knife, being held to her throat Frankie Tomalino tried to fight back but these men knew what they were doing fearing not only for her life but also for her virtue Ms Tomalino tried to escape only to find her exits blocked. Would the ring leader show any kind of mercy, most evidently the answer to that is a resounding NO. Thankfully, her plight was soon over when a passing citizen witnessed the unfolding events and rushed to Ms Tomalinos’ aid. This citizen was not alone she had a couple of burly men to help protect her who also rushed to the aid of the now semi-conscious victim. After a short skirmish, the gang made good their departure leaving Ms Tomalino in the good hands of her rescuers. This news item is not to point out the awful crime that befell Ms Tomalino because as we all are aware the streets are never a safe place to be alone but it is giving credit where it is due. It shows that even in this world we live where it is dog eat dog, every person for themselves that some times there is a Good Samaritan just around the corner. This reporter is convinced that Frankie Tomalino found hers that early evening in a scruffy back alley. 'CURRENT CITY CONDITIONS AND WARNINGS ' City To City By Daizee-Mae As of this printing, the following information has been obtained concerning the conditions in various cities around the nation. Wisdom can be sought in heeding these words of warning. The cities that are not listed have failed to contact the Gazette, so a word of caution to those making their traveling or business plans. Chicago - The city appears to be open to travel and business. Though there are two families making their presence known, neither has placed restrictions on normal business and travel. It is noted that an effort is underway to reduce the muggings and random violence. Detroit - According sources, this area is open to travel and commerce, but do be aware that there is a family overseeing things. People with anticipations of creating a group of their own should perhaps decide on a different location. With the city having guardians, it is understood that random violence will not be tolerated. Dallas - With two families sharing the city, it appears to be a friendly, inviting atmosphere. Random violence is not appreciated, but mutual training exercises (mugging pacts) are acceptable. Anyone wishing to develop a following in the city limits is asked to consult the current family heads. Miami - At last check, this city was open to travelers and business people alike. The reigning family welcomes business as long as it is within specifications. The Gazette has been informed that anything unbecoming to the city be it actions or business will be dealt with accordingly. - General Warning - By Anonymous Recently a citizen known as “blunty” has claimed himself to be a businessman. However over the past few days his business has been to scam hard working people out of their money. He claims to have firearms and ammo at unbelievable prices. If you receive such an offer I suggest you ignore it and move on. In fact my suggestion is to not business with this person at all. I promise you will regret it. 'A SIT DOWN WITH SENTRY ' By Daizee Mae Firstly, thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to sit down and speak with me. I truly appreciate your cooperation concerning this matter. 1. What made you decide to come out of retirement? Well I moved from Miami to Denver and gained the person from the other families to set up, after hitting the rank of capo I wanted my name to be remembered as I had spend many years criming and making my name for myself, however it came to me on night, why to retire I had the money behind me to enjoy my life now why work, it comes to us all over time. 2. When and why did you decide on Denver? It had good connection with my friends in the east and west just a plan away, it’s always good to have your people near you to complete business deals faster. 3. How are the people of that fine city? Were you well received? Very well mostly the streets where empty and the business district had falling apart in the depression but Denver will always have that light in the sky which makes it such an interesting place. 4. Why did you decide to close your doors? A request to return to Miami from my old boss to help him deal with some new business. 5. The people who were in your family there, what has become of them? Mostly they where placed in other families which I knew they could grow in and do well I couldn’t leave anyone on the street you know. 6. Will you try again in another city or are you going back to retirement? I couldn’t say at the moment I have no current plans to come out of retirement now or in the near further. 7. What do you think it would take to bring the cities back to productivity and less bloodshed? In truth a civil war, *smiles *, no really I don’t believe it can be done at the moment but time will try. Families come and go over time and times change. Sorry that’s not much of an answer. 8. And for all the single ladies out there, is there a special someone in your life? *Smiles*, One lady who has always been with me over the years, I am sorry I couldn’t give her name out. 'A LETTER TO THE EDITOR ' Dear Editor, My name is Nietzsche. My family line has been in Las Vegas for probably close to two years. We arrived at the tail end of Concept control when uncle Ronin went to Chicago and New York and killed everything that moved. It was fracking amazing to a new guy. Then the next day Mrs. Glowy went and did it again. This prompted my great grandfather to spawn the Mrs. Glowy Fan Club. At that time my family had never seen anything like it. I mean here I was running around with these guys that could clear out an entire city of enemies just by showing up. Nobody wanted to fight them, and for some reason they liked ole grand dad. The most commonly used name in my family is of course Monster. In the time my family has been on these shores we have seen Vegas rise and fall. We have seen the Concepts rise and fall. At my families most prominent Monster was under Mr. Valentine and once again we seen something that seemed supernatural. MrV went and single-handedly took on an entire family and WON. Then peace reigned for a while. I didn't get to see much of it because being a bit of a hot head I got into a fight with one of our allies, and that ended rather badly..for everyone. This has always been the pattern. A strong leader arises in Vegas and kills a bunch of concepts. Usually after the Concepts have been in Vegas killing us over and over again. Then we sit on top for a while and things are good. Recently there was Angelyka and Good Looking Sal. They were killing Concepts by the bushel. Made men capos all of that. Both of them died honorably facing multiple attackers... Now a while back my family took a vacation from this country it had become dry and boring. Why is that you may ask well I will tell you because there was NO WAR between us and the Concepts. It may have been because the Cepts were too strong. It may have been that uncle Ronin's family line had taken a hiatus. Who knows? What I will say is this before my family took off Uncle Monster went down to the streets and took a look around, and THE MOST interesting thing going on was a beauty pageant. Now our hiatus is over. Grand da was walking down the streets one day just thinking it would be a brief visit like it always was when a friend ran up to him and whispered "it's war Mons it's war again we are suiting up and it's WAR"... Monster smiled and stayed on he contributed to the war effort he gave money he shot a couple shots so on and so forth, and then he walked the streets. He hadn't seen it so vital since the last war he had taken part in. The streets bustled with life. People made speeches for and against the war. People made other speeches declaring for one side or the other or even neutrality (the most notable to Monster was a group of filthy hippies that said they refused to fight)... Now the latest in a long line of Monster's has died. I won’t get into all of that here as I have been talking to others and it will have real life repercussions on my life if I yap about it in my article, but in his passing I have had a few conversations... The Conversation that affected me the most was with a relatively new blood line personified by Emelio Cortez. I told him some of these things in admittedly coarser language and he said I should write an article so that is what I am doing.... Now I have given you the history lesson for a reason.... You have read it to the end...your morbid curiosity about these years old conflict won’t let you do otherwise. Now I ask you to do this. Really really think about it. Those of you that cry about war, and say peace is the way ask yourself this question... Would your life be more or less fun if Vegas and the Concepts stopped killing each other.…? You know what I think your answer will be...but...maybe we're tired of killing one another...maybe it's time for some other cities to take their fucking turn in the barrel.... Who knows maybe the Concepts and Vegas can form a lasting friendship and team up to split the world..it is the next step in an obvious logical procession... 'BUISNESS IS BUSINESS ' By Psyche While walking around Detroit, this reporter noticed something funny. Most places where one could have a drink were simply closed or more or less deserted. It seemed rather strange to me since Detroit and Dallas recently seemed ones of the busiest cities nowadays for certain reasons that are known to everyone who’s informed right. The past few days have been rather tough for business owners all over the US. Their clients have been shot, kidnapped or have simply mysteriously disappeared for unknown reasons. Also a lot of the owners were shot and therefore their business has been closed. The streets, that have been so vivid the last month, now seem rather empty and sometimes even full of specific intellectual level individuals. The names shall not be given, but the loss of their close ones has been so great that they lost any sense of sanity they had left. The loss of relatives, friends or just people they admire, makes people depressed. And depressed people usually prefer drowning their sorrow the old-fashioned way – in a bottle or two. The drink can cause some serious damage to ones mind sometimes. There has been a time when a man walked up to an ice cream cart in Miami and demanded for a bear. Of course they were taken for a madman. And there have been countless times like that, more strange requests in all the wrong places! Rumors have reached certain ears that some people were paid to do so just to cause undesirable trouble, just to make someone annoyed and to provoke a fight. Some even say that the other owners are shot because of the competition. Jealousy? Maybe. Whether that or something else. Business is business in the Mafia world. 'PSYCHE’S BUSINESS REVIEWS ' Detroit is experiencing a tough time with bars, but for anyone who likes quick service, I’d recommend Morebulletz’ Bullet Bar in Detroit. It’s situated in the west side of the city and it has a bright red sign over it. You can’t miss it! The foods and drinks are superb and the prices aren’t too high either although if you’re looking some place for conversation to actually talk out, you’d be best heading somewhere else! If you’re really interested in socializing, I’d recommend a fancy bar in Chicago, called Sentry. The service is great and the place itself is fancy. But best thing about it is that most of the goods are really cheap thus good for even someone who’s not really a money bag. The place had just opened so it’s not too crowded just yet. Best thing I liked is the charming waitress; I think you'd like her too! Best get your hat and be on your way. I promise you won’t be disappointed! A couple of bars are in Detroit and Dallas owned by Sentry. I’ve never been there myself, but from what it looks like from the outside, it has everything you could possibly want in a bar. That includes a casino, a club and of course a dance floor! And even though the service is quick, the place could use more staff. Not that the service is slow, just the owner himself has no time to stop for a chat and just runs mentally about! And if you come alone, that's not really a great pleasure now is it? 'CLASSIFIEDS/ANNOUNCEMENTS ' Sandy's Racing Program Sandy's racing program's now available for a limited time. Let Sandy help you bring home the bacon. The home of the no win no pay. If you don’t win you don’t pay. Ask about our free weekend program. Hice19 (talk) The Mafia Gazette is now recruiting! Think you could handle a career in professional journalism? Contact Daizee-Mae for further details, or drop by the head office in Chicago.